Monday, August 25, 2008

Bleeding in Love

Sitting upon the comfortable carpet of sandy rocks in Canelle, while sifting the coarse sand between my fingers, i decided to look into the very depth of who I am. While searching within myself, i felt the wind pound against me punishingly. With such a harsh response from the once sensual wind which used to bury me with sweet, salty kisses, I found tears streaming down my face. In my beautiful Saint Lucia, sitting amongst what appears to be jaggered rocks behind my blanket of tears, I came to the realisation that no matter how hard one tries as a human being, they may still falter continuously. A while back, i was called mean and even cruel. I thought that to be, highly unlikely with my loving and rather kind disposition. But sitting here, feeling the deadly blows of the wind and searching my spirit, I may have to admit that I do have a rather mean sense of humour. Not purposely hurting the ones i care about but repeatedly doing so with my wit and my sardonic nature.

I am now realising the severe error in my ways and because of this, I am sitting here being battered by a once gentle wind. I was told once that it is easy for a man to transform from man to beast and easily hurt the ones he claims to love with such passion.

Humanity in itself is rather complicated and I suppose all we can really do is try our best to be the best possible people but we can not do it alone. As i am sitted here, i am reminded of Peter, Jesus' disciple who beat his chest and stated that He would Never betray the Son of God when Jesus bluntly stated that he would. Though he may have meant it at the time, when Jesus was captured and beaten, before the cock crew twice, Peter denied Jesus thrice. This tiny reminder is to simply indicate the fact that it is impossible to do things on our own or rather, of our own strength. But the good news comes, when Peter realises his error and asks for forgivenness. In this regard, I apologize for being the mean cuss that I am. And in truth, it was all based on jest but even then, you do not appreciate it, So with my cheeks bathed with salty tears and with the wind tearing at my very core, i apologize only because i love you more than you can ever imagine. :-)

All right my dears, we shall chat at some other point but it is necessary that i bid you adieu! Chao!! Sayanora!!

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