How wonderful and ridiculously easy it would be if we were given manuals to live our lives. Humanity would be rather predictable but more functional and isnt that what we all want? Functionality within each society? But the business of free will just screwed us over :-) If I had a manual to live my life, i am certain the errors I have made and will soon be making would not exist. And even if i did make errors, they would be rather minimal because i have this thing that basically instructs me as to what i should do, say and feel. But seeing that none of us actually possess this manual, we have to go through a whole lot of BS that "enables us to grow as human beings" :-)
I would do so much better with this manual, because at this point, i am simply groping in the dark and going round and round in circles. The reason for my lack of enthusiasm about free will is the fact that we are "free" to do so much but not really! Or is that just me? A friend of mine has been telling me from the moment she got to know me that I think too much. I think about the pros and cons and weigh my options before i make a decision. Never, do i want to regret things and I suppose that is also holding me back from doing many things. It would simply be easier for me, if not for any other, that i own a manual instructing me on the decisions of my life.
I hate messing up, i hate disappointing myself more than anything and i hate hurting those i care about. My friend believes i think too much but i believe we do not think enough. If we take the time to think perhaps the manual that i am praying for will become obsolete. How easy it is, for some of us to sit on our high horse and judge others when we know our secrets and our errors are well hidden.
It makes me sad that we take such little time to think; to think about how we will impact others and how we react to certain situations. I often think about silly things but most of the time, I think seriously. My life is not more difficult than anybody else's but its like bitter gall sipping through me, knowing that if somebody else were me, they would be better at being me- they would make better decisions and they would lead a life free from deliberate pain. I read something that caused me to think further, "nobody can be you better than you" I thought about this statement and I saw the error in it because if someone else were me, their life would not be so purposely entangled and incomprehensible. So perhaps, this statement is telling me that nobody can do incomprehensible and entangled like me. But really, i'd prefer structure, functionality. I would prefer everything to be placed in certain schemas- I'd much rather be instructed.
Now i know it can be argued that the Bible is a manual that instructs our actions, thoughts and so on but the Bible tells us to love all, as we'd love ourselves. But then again, we have to love rightly!!! Did the Bible say, love your brethren a yourself rightly???? What is right love?? Just a question to think about :-)
I wish you all a very pleasant good night!! Buenas Noches! Gute Nacht! Bon soir! :-) Arriverderci! Ja ne!!
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